….that moment of solitude!
Sometime you just want to be all alone, away from everyone…even yourself; it’s not necessary that you’re feeling low or sad but may be just tired…too tired to take the life as it is going…the routine way, the perfect way, the society’s way! You know that life will be okay and all those quotes that you read on Pinterest may come true someday but today is definitely not the day! You may be actually standing in your balcony or sitting in the favorite corner of your room or even lying in your cozy bed but you imagine yourself in a place where you’ve never been before, don’t know it’s name, don’t want to know either, you don’t want to bump into anyone you know or even don’t know for that matter! You just look for that pause, that moment of solitude where you can just sit…away from your miseries, from your messed up life! It’s one of those days when Life is short, Life is a gift, Life is beautiful, all sounds just worn out cliches! Today is that day for me and I’m taking solace in one of Ghalib’s couplets!
Rahiye ab aisi jagah chal kar jahan koi na ho hum-sukhan koi na ho aur hum-zaban koi na ho
Be dar-o-deewar sa ek ghar banaya chahiye koi humsaya na ho aur pasban koi na ho
Pardiye gar bimaar to koi na ho timardaar aur gar mar jaiye to nauha-khwan koi na ho – Mirza Asadullah Khan Ghalib
O my heart go and live in such a place where there is no one no one to talk to no one who speaks your tongue
O my heart build a house in such a way where there are no walls and no doors and no neighbor nor a keeper no one to announce arrivals
If you fall ill there should be no one to nurse you If you die there should be no one to mourn you
Translated by: Zaitun Umer
I wish my feet were so small that I could get lost in these maze! Not to hide from the world but just to explore another!
The Secret World Of Arrietty anyone?
I tried to let it go but…it revisited!
I tried to move on but…it followed!
The culprit is – Hope!
hope lured it back…
hope showed it the track…
hope accommodated it on the top rack…
hope let it seep in through the crack…
hope has this uncanny knack…
hope…doing all the damage behind my back!!
Now running the invincible race…
…to save the grace!!
Let’s see what’s still there to face!
Someone close to my heart once said:
“There are many things we want from life,
there are many things we want in life,
but it’s not always possible to have it all.
The grace is in letting go and move on.”
I just replied!
Some construction work was going on at my place and when I looked at a pile of sand then I couldn’t resist drawing an analogy between sand and memories.
Some memories are like sand.
Those memories used to sit around me as children sit around their father at night. I used to caress their hair while they used to play in the lap of my mind, deep into the nights! Those memories were the most pampered ones. I used to keep them at the safest place in the attic of my brain.
But now those memories have settled on my mind as wet sand. The time gushes like water but it is unable to take away the sand with the flow! The same sand which used to float in the air, spreading light as fireflies has turned heavy!
Today, sitting on the bank of river called life, I’m hoping for some fresh air to kiss the sand to make it dry again so I can blow it away into the oblivion…forever!
Sometimes you feel lethargic…too lethargic to even run away from your pain and sorrow! You just sit there and keep enduring it…knowing that you could have evaded it but you just let it engulf you! It feels like the same ocean which has the power to gulp you down and still you sit at its shore and let your feet soak into it! You curse the same memory you once cherished, you doubt the same decision you were once confident of, you want to rub away the future plans you once drew with permanent marker, you just want a change to happen but at the same time you lack the will to change anything! You don’t want to be termed as stubborn and at the same time you are not ‘ready’ to change…
Today is one of those days…